K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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