Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
If you could come do me into like a 12 hour coma that'd be great
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize