nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
"Don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor, don't bang the neighbor..." he chanted helplessly
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
