Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
Kristen just told everyone at the bar that I've got a huge dick, now Brittany is giving me the eye. What is the opposite of FML?
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
Randomize
