We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
