carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
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