just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize
