yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
