me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I want Samuel L. Jackson to stand beside me and narrate my morning shits.
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
he BROKE his KNEE while we were getting it on, called 911 and the ambulance that showed up contained two paramedics, ONE WAS HIS FUCKING SISTER!!! HOW IS THIS MY LIFE?!?!?!
Poor life choices...?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
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