He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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