We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
