I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
oh great, iTunes now thinks im gay.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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