He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
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