if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
