dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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