I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
Randomize
