you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I just said that Oprah is crazy and like 5 fat white girls jumped down my throat. I sat back and smiled.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
Randomize
