I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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