Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I cannot lay down. I will throw up my life and your life and the class hamster I had in third grade.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
