it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Randomize
