Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
Matt you can be anything you want to be. Including the awesome guy that brings pizza to a bunch of stoned and sorta drunk kids.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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