i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize
