so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
