life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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