I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
its liver damage thursday
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
Randomize
