Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Just saw 30+ dicks. Explain later.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I've been smelling a baby wipe for three minutes. I didn't think I was that drunk but I guess I am
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
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