So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize
