i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
My plan to masturbate 34 times on my 34th birthday backfired. Do you still have those crutches?
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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