God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
