woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
