At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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