coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Eric and I got kicked off of karaoke last night. Apparently, singing about masturbation to the tune of "A Whole New World" is not appropriate and definitely frowned upon by the DJ.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
ALTON JUST DID GRAVY SHOTS. THIS IS WHY HE'S MY HERO
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
