Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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