im pretty sure that there was a mint leaf in my poop this morning. i love mojito season.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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