I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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