I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
I just want to make out with him forever
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Drunk is a universal language darling
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