She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
WHAT IF you could get pizza delivered to you IN YOUR CAR while driving somewhere. Like moving roadside service.
You're High aren't you?
Sooooo high
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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