He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
If you really hate me that much, you need to stop letting me put my penis inside of you. It sends the wrong message.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
Randomize
