he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
