only if we run a train.
done.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
