For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Say hello to your nephew Sir Isaac Meriwether van Catsworth
I'm going to have to start taking your phone after ten. That's when all the cat pictures come
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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