the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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