If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
The sex toys I ordered are being shipped to my billing address instead of shipping address. Take a guess where they're on their way to right now - my parents' house. And the package has to be signed for so there's no way around it. Fuck.
smell my finger.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
Randomize
