There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Randomize
