I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
Randomize
