i just google imaged poop.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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