that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
you're a fucking everclear ninja. the whole goddamn formal blacked out. you're the worst dj ever
but I'm the best friend ever. I got you laid
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Randomize
