But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Randomize
