Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Tequila, beer, rum, gin, and vodka all mixed in my body last night. The whole "never turn down free booze" is catching up to me. Hungover = understatement of the year.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
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