Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize