How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
He called his prostate his "boner button".
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
